Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
An increasing concern for many governments around the world is the declining health of their citizens due to a poor diet. While some people believe governments should be responsible for improving the health of their nation, others believe it is up to the individual. This essay will examine both sides of the argument.
There is no doubt that individuals must take some responsibility for their diet and health. The argument to support this is the fact that adults have free will and make their own choices about what they eat and the exercise that they do. Children are also becoming less healthy. However, their parents are the ones who provide their evening meals so it is their responsibility to ensure these meals are nutritious and encourage them to avoid junk food and sugary snacks during the day.
Despite these arguments, there is also a case for advocating the intervention of the state. People these days often have little choice but to depend on fast food or ready meals that are high in sugar, salt and fat due to the pressures of work. Governments could regulate the ingredients of such food. Some governments also spend huge amounts of tax money on treating health problems of their citizens in hospitals. It would be logical to spend this on preventative measures such as campaigns to encourage exercise and a good diet.
Having considered both sides of the issue, I would argue that although individuals must take ultimate responsibility for what they eat, governments also have a role to play as only they can regulate the food supply, which openly encourages a poor diet. It is only through this combination that we can improve people’s health.
The IELTS diet and health essay has a number of good points which would means it would score highly in the test.
The introduction clearly introduces the topic and sets out both sides of the issue. There is then a clear thesis statement to explain what the essay will do:
This essay will examine both sides of the argument.
Coherence and cohesion are evident from the topic sentenceswhich make the subject of each paragraph very clear:
There is no doubt that individuals must take some responsibility for their diet and health.
Despite these arguments, there is also a case for advocating the intervention of the state.
Transitional phrases and words also guide the reader through the essay. For example:
The argument to support this is…
Children are also becoming less healthy.
However, their parents…
Despite these arguments, there is also…
Some governments also spend…
Having considered both sides of the issue,
The conclusion summarises the writers opinion very clearly. It is always important to make it very clear what your opinion is if it is an opinion essay (you could put your opinion in the introduction too if you wish).
The grammar and vocabulary are appropriate, with a mix of complex sentences and topic related vocabulary.
The content of the essay is also appropriate. It clearly addresses both opinions and provides a number of points to support each argument. The ideas are clearly explained and will not cause any misunderstanding for someone reading the essay.